好多謝在電腦前的你 之 鼓勵和支持呀, 願意花心神去明白我的處境tim!!!!!
我決定會繼續 讀 這個 被受港的臨床心理學界 孤立和排斥 的 course. (因著利益的政治理由), 也不知會否如期希能到美實習並考牌, 而且會進一步加價的course.
神真係 我支盲公竹
, 我就係看唔到前面, 又見唔到神的真人, 是在黑暗中抓實佢, 佢牽住我一隻手, 而另一隻手讓我用佢支竹 篿 篿 duk duk duk 咁. 有時 duk 落個 loon 度... 又有時我好似現在咁 "罷行" 拖都唔Yuk, 猛話好倦
.
我是在期盼 將來 兩年full-time的 實習 (internship), 神 親自 帶我到一個地方, 遇到, 跟到, 那些 祂想我 以後 事奉 和 服侍人 有的 正確定位 的好師傅. 
我真係唔知點做, 和點去, 去邊至遇到. 初步只以為是一些Christian-based Internship, 也只有美國最有歷史而我的言語和passport 又可以去到
我是要將來 在信仰群眾中, 以助人見福音和神的面以至得到自由, 離開心靈的結, 逃出罪的勢力.
這些年來 神
一直讓我 從
1) 人性, 肉體 (人腦, hormones, genetics), 成長背景 去體會和明白 人心靈的結;
2) 讓我從 神學, 釋經學, spirituality靈修學 的學習和操練去抗衡罪的理論, 更能從神的真理那�支取善的力量;
3) 並真人 的服侍(不同的事奉位, 信仰階段的人) , 運用 1 和 2 於人的生命上, 更多與神不同的合作.
我求神讓我經歷神在對方/別人身上的工作, 神這些年來讓我慢慢見到和經歷到.
也是在這種與神一起作工的時間中, 有不同方面的朋友見證我說的 spirituality & psy integration的在我的個人和服侍手法/心態 中 成長
很多朋友都問 我為何都讀唔完, 一定是我好仲意讀書, 潛台詞 "所以唔出來做野",
我並不是因為好仲意讀而一直讀 是我一路做神帶我遇到的人和事 (好多都帶給我不同的震撼和痛心和反省), 就越需要這些裝備, 而且是不太清楚欠什麼, 只覺欠什麼, 再做 . 再問, 再跟, 神又讓我知多一些我需要什麼其他裝備, 也有時候是我跟那 '感覺所欠的' 到處找, 問, 和從專業中尋, 又同神傾?, 問下, 試下; 有時是要忍住唔知的, 要等神遲d 會有指示, 就好似我未來的2年Internship 咁, 我時不時就會為此切切祈禱.
其實只是我 在 回應 我的 呼召 時 一路走下去, 沿路就慢慢發覺是我所需的裝備 以 在 所呼召的路上運用, 在神帶領的所到之處 運用, gift和talent去行這路都預先比了我, 而會因越行越多運用, 而越有.
也因如此, 越用又越發覺 唔夠用, 有 我唔通的地方, 所以要另一些裝置.
我是在兩三年前慢慢才領受到 牧職的呼召的. 我有很多?問號? , 不自在, 唔係掛, 講笑咩... 其中我漸見自己的心理障礙, 知道了自己 不知道什麼了... 就是我不明白何為 牧者的心腸 (wa, 點寫?). 透過神學院的獻身營, 自己教會的獻身小組, ?姐帶我的查經, 與近3年的事奉, 對服侍的人在承擔上心中自然產生的牧養之心, 我真的體會多了.
這年讀PsyD 我就更加 --- 對不能以牧養的心服侍人的心靈而很 掙扎, 不快, 特別覺這一切都不是重要的, 多次向朋友提及 好想快d 正式 讀MDiv, 以牧者的角色 去做.... 我真的很不耐煩, 所以真的好掙扎, 想不如直接讀神學院內的PsyD.... 只是時間不比分開PsyD and MDiv 讀短很多, 又要成HK$70-90萬學費, 就萛我唔食唔住. ai ai ai.. (MDiv = 3年牧職訓練 )
但又不能放棄 服侍 有心理病的人..所以不能只讀MDiv.. 所以這年的PsyD and PhD 讀得特別的痛苦, 非常的掙扎, 我指的是 專業內的角色要求 (PsyD and PhD 都很不同) 又跟牧養的心情大不協調. 我要再想下, 應該在實習時會有更多體會.
寫了好多個鐘頭至寫完....都助我的反省. 都真係幾 口水多過浪..之所以話 見到我 我通常都有 九成 機會 咁長氣
Does anybody know how competitive and what is it like for Christian-based Internship programs in Washington or in Boston??
I am doing a PsyD (Doctorate in Clinical Psychology) program from California off-shore. That means I do all the coursework and placements in my locality, in China, and then I do my internships (pre-doctoral and post-doctoral) and licensure exam in US. It is a very innovative & controversial program, certainly no one has heard of it, I believe.
I am the first-intake of this program, and no body really knows what'd happen to us, and whether we'd get to the stage for licensure exams... Our program is quite certain that they'd get California pre-doctoral internships for us. As they are the largest PsyD-producing institute in California, and they have connections to take in bilingual Psychologists. As all of us are Bilinguals or Trilinguals, so getting an internships that serve Chinese in California is kind of easy for them. And, only a few of us would like to go to US to get the US license, anyway... People can earn much more here than in US, for most of my classmates, they are professionals already here...and so being a Clin Psy in US doesn't sound too attractive.
But I like the well-established CP system, psychological service in US. Very much advanced than that in my hometown. And there is a long history of Christian integration of Psychology and theology, pastoral counselling here in US than anywhere in the world, and not to say my hometown.
Therefore, I want to get Christian-based internships. OR internships at Psychiatry Department in an university (like medical school), as I can then go on with my brain imaging research. I am not sure which way I should go. I haven't discerned that from God..yet.
Language concerns
I have been working with an Irish-boss in an English-speaking research team in univ. for 7yrs or so. Therefore, I am fluent in English, but with a Chinese accent and mostly British pronounciations. I can serve both Chinese or English-speaking people. I am able to do simple conversation in Thai, but don't think I can make it up to the standard of carrying out a psychological assessment in Thai, but in Chinese and English, absolutely no problem.
Where do you think I can get information regarding Christian-based PsyD Pre-doctoral Internships in US (esp Washington & Boston?)
I would like to learn from experience of students participating or those who know people who are doing such Christian-based PsyD or PhD in Clin Psy in US!!!
I can download information from the official websites, but I know NO ONE who can share his/her experience with me ah...
Any personal referral?????
Thanks Thanks!!!!!!!!!!!
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Koala Gal: "I seem to have a difficulty of getting into the core concern and difficulty when I present my views on an issue/cluster of issues. I have to say a few times the same thing and each time may be slightly differently in the hope of getting closer to my concern. I have a rational point, and also an emotional attachment/side in that issue that I don't know how to put it, so I can only go round in a spiral, so maybe getting closer to the point as I repeat the circle.
The emotional side is: I have such a bias of not or deficit in PASSING JUDGEMENT on another person's behaviors for fear of being judgmental. Yes, we need to be careful of discerning right and wrong. You have summarized so succinctly the 4-5 levels of disagreement in Christianity principles/values interpreted from the Bible (just see ur email; from diff interpretation; diff denomination; etc), that's why when we judge that Someone is WRONG, it is the highest level of disagreement and have a narrow sense of actually going against our Christian beliefs.
OK, pretend that we have already got a clear ground of saying that it is WRONG. Then we still need to ask, what give us the reason to JUDGE. For the growth of the church members, for defending what is right/wrong..., etc. Would it be better if the reason is really about faith growth, then let the talk be used in guided discussion, and to discuss why this and that point are of 'danger' or 'actually wrong'?
My emotional side.... my reluctance in passing on judgement, my fear of being judgmental. If the grounds are there and with good reason and practicality to pass a judgement, then do it. I honestly can't get over this idea, as I thought deeply inside that only our God can judge us. We have judges to implement the man-made laws, that's ok."
Yes, I am surprised, but I have known that for quite some time already, and I can see his change and development, from don't know what to say at all, like most church-people did when my boys attended, to being fluent and understanding, but he still lacks (well, he agrees too that it is actually non-existent at all in his mind) BOUNDARIES, which I have come up with a clear set and a subtle set myself and shared with others and my brother last night.
